I was flipping through my drawer looking for my photographs when I came across some of my old high school documents. My diploma, my transcripts, even my AP scores. Even after only two months of school, in an environment that's completely immersed me in Chinese, the official English feels so foreign, so distant, to me. Even though my textbooks are written in English and it's present around me, it's not and will never be the same. I'm happy like this, but...
I look back on my life as it's come thus far, and I see an empty road. I don't know how to handle all the memories I feel I want to erase, but I know I will forever hate myself if I do. I cherish the friends I have back in America, but for some reason, I look back on some of the times we shared, and I realize that I will never have those back, no matter how much I would like to.
I'm halfway across the world from home. I'm surrounded by different people, a different culture, enveloped in a different world. But I am happy here, I am content. But I can't erase my past. No one can. I can't, not because I don't want to, but because the past is carved in stone, held in my heart, like I promised I always would, in so many yearbook messages, through tears, through hugs and smiles and laughter.
❤ I will forever cherish the time we had together. Don't forget me, because I know I will never forget you and the impact you've created in my life.
I would be lying if I said I didn't love you guys anymore. Because I miss you. But why did we leave off so many loose ends like this? Why did you let me go, and why did I let you go?
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